It's Me and You and You and Me, Mommy

 Over the past year I have truly gained a new perspective on motherhood, womanhood, and life in general.  I am so grateful for this time in my life, as chaotic and unpredictable as it may be, and I am so incredibly blessed to be called "Mommy". This Mother's Day I am especially thankful for God's grace. This Mother's Day will be very different for me. It will be my first as a single mom.

I felt led to write this post for a few reasons: To encourage the mom who wants to give up to keep fighting. To sympathize with the mom who thinks that she may lose her mind if the crying does not stop. To let the mom who fed her child cereal for dinner or let her child have candy before 8 AM know, that I too do not always have it all together, nor do I always do it "right". To share in the struggle with the single mom who feels completely overwhelmed and alone and remind her that she is strong and capable. To remind the SAHM that just because she doesn't leave her home to go to work, that I know she is overworked, never paid, and that her job is never done. To empathize with the working mother who leaves her child with someone else every morning and wonders if she is doing the right thing by pursuing a career for personal or financial reasons. To love on and support the mother of a child with special needs who is exhausted and feels helpless. To tell the mother of more than one child that she deserves an award...and a vacation. To grieve with the mom who has lost a precious life. And to express to the woman who wants so desperately to be a mother to never lose faith. Most importantly I wanted to remind all of my mommy friends to live by the standard of grace. Extend it to others (Especially to those who make lists on their blog and do not know proper colon usage). And please grant it to yourself.  Not one of us is going to get it right all of the time. We just aren't. When you feel overwhelmed, take a step back and breathe. Being a mommy is so much easier when you just relax and be mommy and ignore what the world wants you to be. I have learned that I must accept that I cannot do it all. I just can't. Physically and emotionally. And everything cannot and will not be done perfectly (or turn out anything like it looks or sounds on Pinterest!) I am learning to ask for help. I am learning to ask for prayers. I am learning how to let go and cling only to the good stuff!

I have never experienced grace like I have over the past few years. Through stress and disappointment, heartache and solitude, I have felt the grace of God. A divine intervention in my life to protect me from negative thoughts and feelings, give me strength, and fill me with a peace I could have never attained on my own. It is amazing to me how God strategically places people in my life and then uses them to bless me, months, sometimes even years, later. His plan was in place long before mine was.  And I know He has been with me every step of the way. The confidence and strength I have now can only have come from Him. 

On one of the first nights William and I spent in our new home he looked at me and said, "It's me and you and you and me, Mommy", then smiled the sweetest smile.  His words brought me to tears as I realized how extraordinary our new journey would be and just how imperative it was that I never lose my faith or my focus for this joyous little boy. Being Mommy to William was a part of His plan.

Even when life is falling apart, when everything seems to be going wrong, when chaos surrounds you, God is still God and God is still good. He will sustain you. He will give you just what you need.

He will give you grace.

 Happy Mother's Day

Earthly Investments

I am overwhelmed with thoughts and feelings about the enormous loss of life and innocence in Connecticut on Friday. Not only about these tragic events specifically, but the world we live in as a whole. Like many, when I heard the news of the shootings I was at a loss for words. I felt so much grief for those families and all of the children who had experienced horror and brokenness. I was outraged and in disbelief that something of this nature had happened again in our country...and then I watched the response of others. I watched as the media posted pictures of horrified children and parents all over the news. I watched newscaster after newscaster try to figure out exactly what happened and why. I watched social media, like Facebook and Twitter ignite with posts questioning if our President had sincere tears when speaking to the country, posts about gun control, and posts suggesting this event happened because we no longer allow God in our schools. (which is impossible if He is alive in the hearts of those there) And then I saw another true tragedy in all of this. I realized what one of our biggest problems as a nation has become. 

     It wasn't until recently that I understood the diversity of our nation and the division of our people. I have come to realize that many people believe differently that I do. On many different issues- religious and political. As much as I like to stay out of politics it has been nearly impossible to do so in the past year. There have been many pressing issues debated and fought over, but the one common trend I see whenever conflict arises is for people to to criticize others, dehumanize them, disrespect them, and in some cases, physically assault another person for having a different opinion than they do.  Social media has become a place to say whatever you would like without regard for another persons values, feelings, or faith. A place to point fingers and vent frustrations over the direction of this country or the stance of a political party. The horrible things that are happening in our country right now, the countless senseless acts that take place every day in each of our cities, are not occurring solely because of guns, or God being taken out of our schools, or video games. I feel they happen because we fail to invest in the lives of others.

      There are many different meanings to the word invest. Most probably define "investing" as having some financial purpose  (We invest so that in the future we may generate income from a particular stock, etc.) But I am referring to an investment that changes lives. A covering of our neighbors with love and respect. An understanding that we are not on this earth solely to live a life that is pleasing to us, but that were given hearts that were made to feel and take part in incredible things.  This is an issue with the condition of the human heart. So many people today walk around feeling numb. They feel anger, or resentment, or betrayal. They have no hope, no joy, no love. So many people, young and old alike, have never had someone invest in their lives. I feel as though this lack of support or devotion to others is what has sent our society on the downward spiral we are on. 

    Not all people will agree with me because I look at all of this from a Christian perspective, but I would assume that the majority of Americans can agree that there is a disconnect among people in this country and that faith and morality are at an all time low. As a Christian I understand what true hope and joy are. And of course I want for everyone to experience that! But the way to share that hope and joy with others is NOT to isolate them. Or point fingers at them. Or degrade them on facebook about gun control or homosexuality or whatever the media decides to present to us that day . We as Christians should be a people of grace, not disgrace. We should encourage others to love, not condemn someone for who they love. We should cover them with respect and invest in who they are.  It is one thing to invest in a chicken sandwich but investing in the life of someone else makes a far more powerful statement. I have been so saddened by "Christians " over the last few months. So busy with pointing out the sins of others that they have neglected to evaluate their own hearts and struggles. Not one of us is perfect, and had it not been for God's grace I would not be where I am today. I am not better than anyone else because I am a Christian, I am just forgiven. And I will be the first to admit that I often fail. But grace gives me hope. 

    Hope, joy, peace, grace, love. These are all things that people receive when we invest in them (to name a few). I just wonder what the outcome may have been if someone had invested in the young man in CT long before his mind and heart were capable of committing such atrocities.  Yes, he obviously had some form of mental illness(es). (The media wants to put emphasis on the fact that he had some form of ASD and put yet another stigma on a group of people......that's a whole new blog post!). We know that no sane person could commit these crimes. But what if there was more help available to those who suffer from mental illness?  Or more support for parents of children who struggle with psychiatric disorders? Less stigma? More people willing to help and less people casting stones and shunning those who are different? Mental health is another huge concern in this country. People in general are just not happy. Their joy has been stolen, or they have never truly experienced it to begin with. They have no hope and are fearful of the future. The media bombards us constantly with stories which bring about gloom and doubt. Fear drives us to do things we never thought we were capable of doing. Fear tells us to buy more guns, create more powerful bombs. and build bigger armies- none of which are ever going to bring about any good or true peace. 

    What if we taught our children that it IS ok to be different and that it is NOT ok to infringe on the rights of others? What if we spent more time serving others than ourselves? What if we went out of our way everyday to impact someone's life? Just food for thought :)

Beginnings

   This blog is mostly to share my life with others. I live such a blessed and beautiful life and I wanted a space that was my own to share my experiences as mommy and child of God. (And yes, post endless amounts of photos of my child) I have always wanted to blog but never found the time to get started until now. Hopefully I will encourage some and entertain a few along the way. 

The name:

 Grace is a concept that I didn't completely understand until recently in my life. It is something that I have to share with others; something I am called to give, and so thankful to receive. The name of my blog came from many different places, but most importantly it is a truth I have learned. Grace does happen, and Grace truly experienced will always result in Grace expressed. 


A few years ago I read the book "The Me I Want to Be" by John Ortberg. I wrote about the many ways I was challenged by this book here. Worth reading! Over two years later I find that I still need to be reminded of God's faithfulness and what it means to be a child of God on a daily basis. And the only way to do that is to live by grace. 

Here we go!